A young bachelor (Paul Williams) must marry within the 7 week in order to claim a $3 million inheritance; a drab widow (Michele Lee) from the San Fernando Valley poses as a glamorous adventuress and captures the heart of the Captain; a confirmed male chauvinist (Dick Gautier) angers his fiancee (Barbara Rhoades), who finds comfort in sick bay with the ship's doctor; and a scandal sheet reporter (Marcia Wallace) sets out to compile material for a sins-at-sea story.